Chapter 134: Ode to the Millennium Recipe!

Finally, the video call with the African fan was over.

Jiang Lun asked Qiao Ranran with a wry smile, "Are these really my fans? Why does it feel like they're here to stir up trouble?"

"I feel the same way!" Qiao Ranran laughed. "But this isn't something we can control. After all, netizens come from all over the place. In the world of the internet, you get all sorts of people!"

"Hmm! That makes sense!" Although Jiang Lun said this, he felt a subtle sense that something was off. Were these fans he was video-chatting with real? Why did it feel like some of them were overacting?

Before he could dwell on it, the next fan came online. This time, it was even more surprising: a chef wearing a tall toque and a white apron. Judging by the background, he seemed to be on a balcony—and this balcony looked strangely familiar.

"Hi! Hello there, Chef!" Qiao Ranran greeted him. "Can you see me waving?"

The chef stared at something off-screen. The feed glitched a couple of times before he spoke. "You... hello. I... here... the connection is lag-lag-lagging..."

"Oh! Why don't you try adjusting it? We'll wait for you. If it doesn't work, we'll move on to the next person!"

"No, wait... I'm watching a video right now. Let me close the player!" The chef scrambled around. A moment later, the screen stabilized. He waved and said, "Hi, are you still there? Jiang Lun? Brother Lun, can you see me?"

"Yes! No more lag now!" Jiang Lun smiled, though he remained skeptical.

"That's great! I love you so much, and my wife and daughter love you too!" The chef said enthusiastically, beckoning to someone behind him. "Wife, come here! I managed to get a video call with Jiang Lun!"

A moment later, a woman appeared on screen. She was also wearing a chef's uniform, though hers was much dirtier and covered in flour.

"Hello!" Regardless of whether they were genuine, Jiang Lun greeted her politely.

The woman beamed, waving vigorously, and spoke in a thick, regional dialect. "Oh! Jiang Lun? I can see you! Can you see me waving?"

"I can!" Jiang Lun smiled. "May I ask what your profession is?"

"My husband and I are self-employed. We run a small restaurant; I handle the dough, and he's the chef!" The woman's smile was so earnest that it was hard to believe she was acting.

"Oh!" Jiang Lun's mind raced. He asked, "Brother, what is your signature dish?"

"Me? Uh, fish!"

"Do you know how to make red-braised fish?"

"Of course! Especially clear-stewed; that's my specialty!"

"Oh!" Jiang Lun smiled. He had already guessed the truth, so he decided to play along with the production team. He continued with a smile, "Sounds like your restaurant must be very popular!"

"It's alright!" The chef chuckled. "The customers are supportive. If you have the chance, come visit us, and I'll treat you to my cooking!"

"Sure, sure!" Jiang Lun nodded repeatedly.

"Oh, my old man loves your songs!" his wife added. "Especially that one, 'Double-Chun-Lun.' He hums it in my ear every day until I'm sick of it!"

"What 'Double-Chun-Lun'!" her husband retorted, annoyed. "It's 'Nunchucks' (Shuang Jie Gun)! Look at how uncultured you are!"

"Oh, oh, oh, I said it wrong, don't mind me!" The woman covered her face, embarrassed.

"It's fine!" Jiang Lun waved his hand with a smile.

Qiao Ranran had been watching closely. Seeing him cooperate so well and still not realizing he was being pranked, she pursed her lips and smiled. "Jiang Lun, since this chef likes your songs so much, why don't you sing one for him live?"

"Live?" Jiang Lun scratched his head. "I suppose that's fine!"

"What are you going to sing?" Qiao Ranran goaded him. "How about 'Nunchucks'? But you have to change the lyrics—can you change them to dish names?"

"That's quite a challenge you've set..." Jiang Lun gave a wry smile and was about to refuse when a sudden flash of inspiration hit him. He smiled slightly. "Alright, but let's not do 'Nunchucks.' How about I improvise a song using dish names right now?"

"Improvise?" Qiao Ranran was stunned. "Can you do that?" But she realized the question was redundant; hadn't he just shown off his improvisation skills?

Before Jiang Lun could speak, she quickly corrected herself, "Alright, I believe you! Let's hear how you're going to sing it!"

Jiang Lun didn't hesitate. He asked Ma Le for two more tablets. On one, he pulled up a traditional music rhythm from the software—the system came with various pre-set accompaniments, much like a synthesizer where one could press chords on a simulated keyboard. On the other tablet, he selected the timbres of four instruments: flute, erhu, guzheng, and orchestral strings.

Once ready, he gestured, "Okay!"

"That fast?" Qiao Ranran asked in surprise. "You don't need my tablet for this?"

"Nope!" Jiang Lun laughed. "I only needed yours earlier for the DJ effects. I don't need it for this!"

"Oh!" Qiao Ranran nodded, only half-understanding. She turned to the chef couple on the video call. "Are you ready to listen? Jiang Lun is going to start. This is a song dedicated to you!"

"We're ready!" the pair said, looking excited and expectant.

"This song is also dedicated to all the foodies in the world!" Jiang Lun smiled. He played a melody simulating a flute on the tablet and began to sing:

"Xiao long bao, char siu bao, custard, sesame, and red bean bao!
Big meat bao, veggie bao, and soup-filled bao!
Eating is the essence of life, fleeting in the blink of an eye!
But the feast on the table remains forever grand!"

Hearing these lyrics, Qiao Ranran's mouth hung open. She was dumbfounded—he really was a foodie! The staff on set also shared a knowing smile; they found it quite amusing.

Suddenly, the musical style shifted. Jiang Lun switched the simulated timbre to strings, and the rhythm turned into a jazz style. He pressed the "Intro/Start" button on the other tablet, and the sound of gongs and drums erupted in a burst of Chinese folk music.

"Beijing roast duck, mapo tofu..."

As Jiang Lun sang, everyone started counting along. Good heavens, nearly fifty types of Chinese delicacies, and not one was repeated. Furthermore, they were curious: how did Jiang Lun remember all of them? And to turn them into a song? It was simply... miraculous! He truly lived up to the name of a foodie!

"The world is big and chaotic, the earth keeps spinning, with countless joys and sorrows!
Always overthinking, might as well stop thinking at all!
Just have a simple meal, then another, eating until your eyes shine!
Then exercise, burn off the extra fat!
Aw! Steamed pork dumplings!
Aw! Beef meatballs!
Fried dough cakes, braised pork ribs, golden Yangzhou fried rice!
Whether you want to eat or not, you have to eat!
Just give up the resistance, let's eat together!"

...

Qiao Ranran, who was from the Northeast, couldn't help but swallow her saliva when she heard "pork stewed with vermicelli." The staff on set were the same. Those from Beijing were proud to hear "roast duck" and "noodle with soybean paste," while the folks from Sichuan were delighted by "mapo tofu," "garlic pork," and "spicy hot pot." They were a bit puzzled by "twice-cooked pork stewed with pickled cabbage" and "chilled rice cakes with hot dry noodles"—what were those?

The director in charge of monitoring the shoot couldn't take it anymore. He took off his headphones and said to his assistant, "Get me... never mind, just make me some instant noodles!"

The executive producer on the side laughed bitterly. "Let's eat together, the whole world has to eat, don't struggle, eat while it's hot! Eat! Eat! Eat! Eat! It's all about eating, what a foodie!"

"This song is hilarious, but it's a great stress reliever!"

"I'm homesick!"

The other staff members began to discuss which dishes in the song were from their hometowns and which ones they hadn't tried yet.

The original song was synthesized on a computer, performed by the virtual character Luo Tianyi and produced by H.K. Jun. In another world, it was a legendary song that gained massive attention upon its release on Bilibili. In this world, Jiang Lun was singing it live; as a man, and with the accompaniment arranged simply on software, it was vastly different from the original in every aspect. Yet, the feeling conveyed by the lyrics remained intact.

When he first heard the song, he just thought it was funny, especially since the original vocal was a cute,萌-style girl, which left him feeling very relaxed. Since he had the opportunity today, he used it without a second thought. Judging by the expressions of Qiao Ranran and the staff, the song had piqued their interest.

"My stomach is protesting!" Qiao Ranran complained. "What should I do? I'm hungry, extremely hungry!"

"There's nothing I can do about that!" Jiang Lun spread his hands helplessly. "Who told you to listen so intently and let your mind wander while doing so?"

"I'm getting blamed for this?" Qiao Ranran glared at him. "No way, you have to treat me to dinner. I didn't even eat lunch!"

"Fine, I didn't eat lunch either!" Jiang Lun said, looking at Ma Le, "Those dishes were all eaten by him!"

"Uh, I'm hungry too!" Ma Le put on a pitiful expression. For a foodie, this song was both a gospel and a torture!

"Fine, we'll make sure to bleed him dry later!" Qiao Ranran laughed. "But that's for after the recording. Right now, we still have to interact with the fans!" She turned to the chef couple and asked, "How was Jiang Lun's song?"

"Great! After being a chef for so many years, I've finally found a song that suits me!" the man laughed. "I'll play this on loop at the restaurant; it's sure to attract a lot of customers!"

His wife reminded him, "First, you have to be able to cook every dish in this song!"

"Oh, right! I forgot to ask!" Qiao Ranran suddenly remembered and turned back to Jiang Lun. "How did you memorize all those dish names?"

"These are all common Chinese delicacies. If I can handle those long rap lyrics, this is a piece of cake!" It was true; Jiang Lun hadn't really tried to memorize the lyrics. After listening to it enough times, he just learned it. The original lyricist was also very talented; the words flowed naturally and weren't awkward at all.

"So, what made you create such a song? I thought you'd describe it from the perspective of people eating grains and crops, but you went straight for the dish names. The chorus is really good, though!"

"It was all improvised!" Jiang Lun bluffed. "Didn't you ask me to sing using dish names? I just sang a couple of lines!"

"Did I?" Qiao Ranran played dumb. "Oh, I forgot!"

"Hehe..." Jiang Lun smiled. "We'll see when the show airs!"

"Don't worry!" Qiao Ranran said solemnly. "The production team will edit that part out!"

Jiang Lun was speechless. So he was the one getting bullied?

Seeing his reaction, Qiao Ranran immediately changed the subject. "By the way, even though it's improvised, it needs a title so the production team can introduce it! Hmm... 'Reporting Dish Names' sounds pretty good!"

"Uh..." Jiang Lun scratched his nose. "Isn't that a Crosstalk piece? This song already has a name!"

"Oh? You've already thought of a name?" Qiao Ranran asked. "Tell me!"

"'Ode to a Millennium Recipe'!"

"Hmm? Millennium... Recipe... Ode?" Qiao Ranran pondered it a few times, then gave a thumbs up. "Great name, very classy!"

Jiang Lun smiled slightly; that was its original name, after all.

After the video interactions were over, the screen returned to normal. Qiao Ranran asked Jiang Lun with a smile, "How did it feel chatting with those fans?"

"It was great!" Jiang Lun had already seen through everything. Much of it had been him playing along, including singing 'Ode to a Millennium Recipe,' all for the sake of the show's effect.

Sure enough, Qiao Ranran revealed a mysterious smile. "Do you want to meet them in person?"

"Them?" Jiang Lun pretended not to know anything. "Can I? Isn't there still that African brother in Rwanda?"

"So what if he's in Rwanda?" Qiao Ranran suppressed a laugh. "Even if he were on the moon, our production team could bring him here!" She pointed to the door. "If you don't believe me, look!"

As she spoke, the door opened. The individuals he had just video-chatted with filed in: the first beauty, the foreign girl, the African brother, and the chef couple—they were all there.

"Wow! No way! Is your production team that high-end?" Jiang Lun opened his eyes wide and pointed at them theatrically. "Don't tell me your team has a time-space transporter to move anyone from anywhere at any time?"

"Ah, hahaha..." Qiao Ranran burst into laughter, but then she suddenly felt something was wrong. She sobered up and looked at Jiang Lun calmly. "Why?"

"Why what?" Jiang Lun looked innocent. "I should be the one asking you why!"

"Oh!" Qiao Ranran squinted. "You knew it was a prank the whole time, didn't you?"

"What prank?" Jiang Lun kept a straight face before bursting into laughter. He couldn't keep it up and clutched his stomach. "Yes, I realized it from the chef couple's question. Hahaha, he actually said red-braised fish is clear-stewed... haha..."

...

P.S. Using this 'Ode to a Millennium Recipe' to wish everyone a Happy Spring Festival. During the break, eat well, eat well, eat well, eat well...